VULTURE.  VULTURE’S ECO CHALLENGE.  
For many years now in the pages of culture we have placed enormous focus on environmental responsibility and, like many of us, looked to the recent Copenhagen Conference to create a unified roadmap for the future of the planet. This summit was to be supported by all governments and address global warming to stabilise the earth’s climate for mankind’s healthy and prosperous future. But as we all now know, it was a fiasco, and nothing useful was achieved. Yet the clock ticks on… nothing for it but to raise Vulture from his Christmas siesta for a good old spleen venting.

So, it looks like our beloved politicians have failed us again. Ignoring the majority of Earthlings who kinda fancy having a habitable world for the rest of our days (and perhaps bequeathing something to our grandkids that is slightly more bucolic than that which befell the dinosaurs) those collective geniuses treading the corridors of power have effectively given us all the ‘bird’. I speak of the recent Copenhagen conference that turned into an unmitigated disaster as an exercise in global governance.  How this pack of Einsteins could not fathom that all our economies are doomed if we don’t have a sustainable climate – so beholden are they to the interests of big coal, big manufacturing, big money… big idiocy.I hear climate change deniers spruiking their lies about global warming being some heinous plot by Trotskyites attempting to impose a totalitarian socialist state upon the planet. Or, that we have all been conned into thinking that this could be some well meaning beat-up, not unlike the Y2K bug myth.

Well according to that propaganda division of extreme leftism, ahem, the Scientific American: “There is no way to keep the temperature increase under two degrees Celsius unless big emitters start taking serious action almost immediately. The U.S. and the other industrial nations have an obligation to lead this transition. They have caused most of the build-up of gases to date, and they have the largest per capita emissions, the greatest wealth and the most technology. And they agreed to their responsibility to lead in the United Nations Framework Convention on Climate Change of 1992, to which the U.S. and 191 other countries are parties.”

Or, to those who doubt the accuracy of Climate Modelling, this from that subversive evil cell of global misinformation, the U.S. Environmental Protection Agency: “… models have proven to be extremely important tools for simulating and understanding climate, and there is considerable confidence that they are able to provide credible quantitative estimates of future climate change, particularly at larger scales. Models continue to have significant limitations, such as in their representation of clouds, which lead to uncertainties in the magnitude and timing, as well as regional details, of predicted climate change. Nevertheless, over several decades of model development, they have consistently provided a robust and unambiguous picture of significant climate warming in response to increasing greenhouse gases.”

But, instead of governments uniting and taking decisive action, many have systematically understated the danger and made ridiculous assertions that unless China and India agree to limits in CO2 emission, then no action should be taken by first world nations (who are pretty much responsible for the mess we’re currently in) to improve climate change, using the mantra “if it hurts the economy.” This last rationalisation translates into “if it costs anybody any money”. Um, okay so why don’t we apply this anti-spending philosophy to stuff like the funding of armies and anti-terrorism measures? You get the general idiocy behind this posture.

Well, what we need is a bit of good old-fashioned people power!If each one of us takes personal responsibility for reducing our carbon footprint, who knows? (And even if Global Warming turns out to be a crock, wouldn’t it be nice to have a less polluted and more habitable world… I mean where’s the downside?) But first, let’s cut the wheat from the chaff. This means exploding a few other myths that could be charitably considered ‘green-washing’.Bio-fuels. The thing about this is that whilst the stuff spewing out from your exhaust pipe may be less carbon heavy, nobody has bothered to mention the incredible increase in carbon emission caused by the felling of rainforests and the huge transport and production emissions created by turning corn to fuel. Recent science suggests that the CO2 emissions are potentially greater from bio-fuels. Nice one.

Okay, I’ll go an electric car then. Well where do you think the charge for the batteries is coming from? The power-grid for crissakes! And, unless your power is solar or wind or some other sustainable source, all you will be doing is increasing your domestic emissions to reduce your car’s.

Here’s a thought… what about not driving so much. Instead of driving the kids to their school that’s just around the corner, how about walking. It’s fun and your kids might even get fit. Oh, and how about making friends with people who you work with and live in your area and car pool. The conversation is better, you’ll have more money in the bank and you’ll get to work quicker, because if this concept catches on there will be less cars on the road during peak hour. Can you see a pattern emerging here?

Let’s look at other ways we can do our bit. We could start by not having every light in the house blazing. Just like our granddad. In his case it wasn’t for any namby-pamby ‘save the earth’ nonsense, it was just good sense. And the family could eat meat occasionally from the savings. Oh, and they drank water straight from the tap. Holy shit, there’s an idea! Can you believe that in a world where a sixth of the population don’t have access to clean drinking water, here we are in the West, with the purest water piped into our houses as a right, buying water in bottles, which ml. for ml. is more expensive than petrol. If some alien explorers lobbed here tomorrow and saw this they would think that we are all lunatics.

And here’s the rub; the Pacific Institute recently found that in 2006 alone it took approximately 17 million barrels of oil equivalent to produce plastic for bottled water consumed by Americans only – enough energy to fuel more than 1 million American cars and utes for a year. Moreover, most of this water was sold in polyethylene terephthalate (PET) bottles. The manufacture of every ton of PET produces around 3 tons of carbon dioxide. Thus during this one year, this bottled water created more than 2.5 million tons of CO2.
So, for crying out loud, if you must tote a bottle of water around, fill your empty up from the tap. It’s as pure as you’ll get and you’ll be saving more of the hard earned.

As the climate gets crazier our weather is going to become more extreme. So think about the consequences of slamming that air-con up to Sahara in winter and Antarctica in summer. Another mad tip from Gramps…  open a window in summer, and wear a sweater in the colder months. It’s incredible just how forgiving the weather is if we adjust our living expectation and habits seasonally. Speaking of seasons, you know it’s actually okay not to have access to watermelon in winter and chestnuts in summer. Alas, our Western appetites are now attuned to having rights to use to anything, anytime – without realising, that apple you’re munching into may have travelled half the way around the world, creating even more CO2.
Think global – source local. And, to this scribbler, life becomes more exciting with some seasonal variety…
A few other tips. Get yourself a granny trolley and never accept a plastic shopping bag again. Shop at a farmer’s market (they’re popping up everywhere) for your fruit and veg – you’ll be amazed by the flavours, the quality, the savings and you’ll have some fun to boot! Put some chooks in your backyard and, as well as enjoying the finest eggs imaginable, you’ll help put a stop to the cruelty of battery poultry farming. While you’re at it start a veggie garden and get some dirt under your fingernails. Food plus fitness, how good is that? The thing is, we all think that as individuals we don’t make much impact. But just imagine the difference that we could make as a nation. And as many nations. It’s not hard.